Yule Letter to Befana

Dear Befana!

You are the spirit that brings the gifts of life, but you don’t live on the North Pole. You live in the Air, and fly a hefty broom. Salutations to you!

Before Sinta Klaas was adopted from the Dutch and made into Santa Clous, it was you who brought gifts to the children, sweets for the good, and you only knew good kids. Befana! Mother Befana! Granny Befana! The old year opened up her cornocopia, out poured the harvest, the grains, the fruits, the figs and the grapes, the wine, and the breads.

Then you flew off again to fill your apron with more goodies. It was you who bid grandmothers to cook and bake, create huge celebrations around food, which is the basis for all life. You promised continuity, you promised new years, you promised old age and longevity of our species. And you have always delivered. Great old Befana, beloved by all children. Come to us again!

As a good witch I am writing my wishes down to send it to you in a small fire in my backyard. I am writing, “I like to have full good health” Befana, if I may. Last year I suffered a bad injury,which still smarts a bit when I walk . Let that lift from me and be as good as new. Let ten thousand little grandmothers mend my bones together so they can be strong in my old age.

I am writing, You brought out two of my books into the 21st century. Let them find their large audience at last. Let the mouth-to-mouth recommendations bring about plenty of sales, let the Goddess presence be strong this century, through my work and of the other sacred scribes.
“The Holy Book of Women’s Mysteries” is stunning in this new incarnation! “Summoning the Fates” has soothed so many suffering hearts, let them find their new audience as well.

Since its ok to wish for three things, that’s your favorite number, dear Befana send me some inspired interns. Interns with the wish to serve the Goddess. Look amongst the Generation Z folks. I am confident that you could find me interns, at least one who would help me with my autobiography and my evolving Femina Nation.

In gratitude I'll put out figs and honey for you in the window, and watch the skies darken for a moment as you decend upon my rooftop.

I shall burn incense in your honor, spill the milk on the good earth, and let my little red squirrels eat the figs. Let the ants eat the honey.

Thank you dear Granny Befana, flying overhead I can hear your fearless cry, the sound of the local silver black crows.

Blessed be and blessed Yule to us all.

TV blahs

I settle down after 6pm on my couch, after all I deserve this, I am an Elder, lets watch some mindless stuff. I am never disappointed when I have zero expectations.

Thank Goddess for the clicker! I click madly, let’s see the News, everybody got the News, each network reporting on the very same event, why they think if they are different from each other we’ll miss out on some vital piece of news, like something has gotten blown up, there was an accident on the Bay Bridge, commuters are slowed down into a crawl. Come on!

What is this attachment to bad news? You could report on some good news too. Like in most of the world, there is no war. Yes. Imagine this, out of the many many countries, we see Somalia warring, Arabs have taken over, killing the blacks who are the Somalians. Ok. Bad. Iraq? Corner stores blown up, they were selling alcohol. Hmm, a strange place to sell alcohol, but never mind, it’s a corner store on the planet. Does it deserve all that coverage?

But in the hundreds of other places in the world there is normal life, building new things, children are born, and oldsters are dying as they should.

Just once I like to hear the anchor say … A couple of countries are still in the throes of war, but most of the Planet is peaceful at this hour, Celebrating life. They could do this for Christmas for example, to give us a heads-up.

Then there is the weather. Now this is deserves to be reported upon. We see the entire continental USA with the curling Lows and Highs, bringing rain here and sending snow over there. Avoiding California most of the time, we hardly get rain anymore. I think of the Cherry season, please let it be a little rain for them to grow plump, then no wind and no rain because once they bloom, the bees won’t work the orchards if its windy. They are no fools. To me the Cherry season is like an oracle on how the Planet is doing. There was a year when there were no cherries available from the farms where I usually go to pick my 28 pounds of cherries, which then I eat in two weeks, and I send some to my kids.

It was a sad season.

But please do I get a new CSI? It’s Thursday night. It doesn’t seem to.
Come 9 pm, prime time, reruns everywhere. Now I know the writers are on strike. But how long? Does that mean no new shows? Didn’t they shoot ahead of time? What does this mean to me a writer?

While I ponder that heavy question, I click around on my basic cable.
I settle on the animal station.

This is usually very good. I love all animals, but oops, watch out dear Wilder beast! Watch that Crocodile! Ouch! Wilder beast legs are chomped off, blood colors the waters red.

Click!

I am too sensitive. Nature is fair, everybody eats somebody else, especially us humans. We eat everybody. We are the top predators.

I don’t like to know that.

Click!

Oh, the History Channel. Here I still find good stuff to watch. I love the way they build back up the images of the old temples, with the computer originated images. I see how splendid it was back then. Goddess statues, Goddess worship. If only I could have lived back then. Then suddenly the pits where they sacrificed animals to their gods, then taken it home and had it for dinner. Not to gruesome. I stay.

The night is advanced, I yawn.

I go to bed playing in my head shows I would write instead of the current fare. Thank heaven I have a vivid imagination.

What I wish for Yule?

What a difference it makes when more then just a few women take on a project! Tinn's enthusiasm and hard work got us the new Goddess camp, the teamwork with Cerridwen got us the ads out and my website enhanced.

Its very hard to get good traffic on a website, and even harder to make a living. We are no way there yet. The booksales have been stimulated by your blessed 15 women who bothered to call. Had I had this kind of lukewarm (only 15 out of 800) support when the Holy Book of Women's Mysteries book was first out, we would never have a Goddess Movement today.

We were thinking in my witchy office, what's happening? This list is my lifeline to the world.

If ALL OF YOU CALLED A BOOKSTORE there would have been a SURGE of sales by now. Without the Holy Book Of Women's Mysteries the yearning of many women would go unanswered. It is what was channelled by me to replace the patriarchal religions with meaningful spirituality. We were lucky to see this book reemerge in a stunning new format, and now its a great seller in CANADA! But not in the USA.

What I wish for Yule?

I like to see my Z list come alive. Become a list of feminist activists again. Even if just half would do more than just read posts.

We are the Seeding generation; seeding the new century. We have started and developed the future, at least good part of it. We are blessed to live in the future as many others like our sisters in Islamist countries live in the dark patriarchal past.

We are responsible for each other. The Z list is very good on this issue, generously extending soul energies to each other, each time asked. I bless for your that. Continue the love and empathy.

We have started a new emailing list called Dianic Nation. Here we offer worldwide events to support if you are near them. If you have organized something Goddess oriented, you can list them there for free. We have also created a Dianic Nation website where those listings are posted and a free seasonal publication that you can get at the website.

It reminds you that we are part of a Global Goddess Movement. No small achievement so early in the 21st century.

In the future we are going to call for more action. For example, feminist letter writing campaigns and rituals against women killers, wherever they are.

I know its a busy time for all of you now, so i wish you all the season's best.

Watch for further news on the upcoming Gathering the Goddess festival, my journeys and see how you can tie in. Don't forget next year in the Fall, fly to California. There will be a pick up bus ride for you to the camp.

There we can embrace each other in person at last.

Yule tide blessings!
Zsuzsanna

The Horrible - Wonderful Year of ‘07

Here is the time to begin to reflect on the year about to pass. Goddess bless, I had a horrible, wonderful year.

Last year this time I was immobile, my SI joint was inflamed, I was running fever of 101, and none of the docs could diagnose me.

The uncertainty of it all … the humiliation of not being able to walk, the loss of fun and friends, my life was conducted on the phone and online. I had to cancel all obligations. And always, this possibility that they had to open up my hip replacements and redo it; putting me on antibiotic drips for three months, and then replace the hips with new ones. And, I would never walk again normally.

All this because fever in this country can only come from infections. Not so.

I talked to a woman who said she had SI joint inflammations. She ran fevers and it took 2 years to heal. The SI (Sacroiliac) joint doesn’t get blood flow.

This was a time when I could really tell who was my friend and who wasn’t. I had few visitors. My dog had more friends then I.

I watched an extraordinary amount of TV.

The quality of viewing basic cable was abhorrent. I started writing my own TV show. Read many books.

This lasted for 8 months. Only then did my fever started going down. It took even more time to completely be free of it.

But the walking could only happen with crutches. Still I cannot manage stairs.

This part of my life was very disappointing. I thought all was over.

But by May I could travel. Imagine me at the airport. They took way my crutches. I had to go through limping and in pain, the entire airport ordeal.

I went to an esoteric book convention in Denver, where I won a price last year for Celestial Wisdom. This year Summoning the Fates came out via Llewellyn, and I was signing books by the hundreds.

Felt hope return into my heart.

After Denver, I had lots of pain return, spasms of my muscles, searching for meds that worked, only steroids would. One had to be careful with those.

The Holy Book of Women’s Mysteries was now on the working table. Weiser Books prepared to release it, and I had some meaningful work out of it, rereading the entire book cover-to-cover. Considering that it was originally written 1975, the book miraculously stood the test of time … still reverent, interesting, lots of information in it still unexplored by the many many women’s groups it has spawned.

Then around Halloween the book was reborn!

The cover art was done by Shakti, a young visionary artist whom I only told to please make an image of Rhiannon, with butterflies flying out of her mouth. She is the goddess of transformations, her words transform, as the butterflies. Shakti got inspired instantly. Took her two hours and she came up with this red haired young goddess, beautiful and fierce at the same time, with butterflies around her coming out of her mouth.

Perfect!

After the Holy Book hit the stores I asked my sisters on my email list to call bookstores for me, and ask them if they carried the new Holy Book. Only about twenty women actually did it … out of the hundreds. Don’t ask me why. I cannot imagine why it’s so hard to give back a little energy to those who have created a space for feminist witches all these years. Really sad, but this is how it is now.

Where are the Feminist Witches?

But some women on the email list caught fire. Especially my moderator Tinn. She started talking about a new festival with the Holy Book as theme. Life seemed almost normal again. As you know I have produced about nine Goddess festivals in California, where there are redwoods and sunken earth temples, and no mosquitoes to bite us when skyclad.
A very sad thing happened then when I went to see Shekhinah Mountianwater, battling her cancer. I found her in the last days of her life. As promised I had given her her last rites, anointed her with rose oil blessed by Amma, see my blog about it.

But as the goddess is both death and love, I found my new true love there in Shekhinah’s living room holding energy for her dying friend.

She and I instantly fell in love.

She too organized Goddess-Faery gatherings and knew about my work. We both came from a different kind of loneliness. I was alone now for a long, long time. She was in a relationship in which she felt very lonely as well.

This love and the rest of the year have taken a sharp turn for the better.

Suddenly we are having a new women’s festival … Gathering the Goddess! It’s is going to be devoted totally to the “Holy Book of Women’s Mysteries.” We have set a date September 5-7 in ‘08. Advertising is already out about it, see my website: www.ZBudapest.com. We have twenty-some early registrations as well.

So this part of the year had much love and wonder. Miracles. As love is always a miracle.

Gathering the Goddess is a blessing. The Holy Book are making their way into women’s hands, a brand new generation.

Goddess, let them learn to be activists!